A Week of Wondering
by Mademoiselle Anime Amour
Summary: Sequel to "A Day of Introspective Reckoning." Riku's week starts out ordinarily enough, but it quickly becomes one week that will change his life forever.
1. Chapter 1: 9:17 PM, Sunday

**A/N: OK, considering me and probably other readers hated the ending to "A Day of Introspective Reckoning", I decided to make a sequel of sorts to it. Only it's from Riku's point of view, but we still get to find out what happens with Olette. Only this is in the space of a week, because Riku's story turned out to be way more eventful.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 1: 9:17 PM, Sunday<strong>

Great, Monday morning would be here in less than twelve hours, Monday being Riku's least favorite day of the week. Isn't it everybody's? He is always unable to get to sleep on Sunday night, and he usually pays the price. Staying up 'til three AM, just because he can.

To make matters worse, he has a math test tomorrow, something he barely studied for. He can't help it. He just ain't the math type of guy, even though guys are normally the ones good at this type of stuff. Not him. If anything, he really isn't an English sort of person either.

Kind of a dreamer, he's the artsy type. More specifically, the musician type.

Yeah, yeah, it's stereotypical once you take one look at him with the graphic T-shirts, the band T-shirts, and the long hair. Of course, the long hair completes his look. Because not only is he a musician, he's a true rocker at heart. Total metalhead who headbangs to Slipknot, Avenged Sevenfold, and all those other heavy music bands. This is probably the reason why his hearing is so screwed-up. These days, he always asks his friends to repeat themselves at loud, crowded school. Not so much anywhere else. At least his hearing remains solid enough so that he can hear himself play guitar.

Currently, Riku lies on top of his bed, his eyes falling closed as he tries to fight sleep. It's only nine-something. He doesn't want to fall asleep yet. Maybe he should update his Facebook account or something, even though he's rarely on there any more. The last time he got on there, Aqua mentioned that she had guy drama. Why she attempted to confide in him of all people was beyond him. He later found out she approached ten other kids about this issue. How Ven was apparently such a jackass, constantly paying attention to other girls when he was _her _boyfriend. Not to mention she got flak for talking to her guy friends from him. The nerve of that idiot...

So, it went on and on and on. Facebook can be overrated like that.

As he lazily rolls over on his side, Riku wonders at the same time why that Olette girl doesn't have one. Now, that's a girl he wouldn't mind talking to again and getting to know. God, she is cute. To be honest, he has had a bit of a crush on her since middle school. When he got to high school, though, he went out with two or three girls. None of them turned out to be all that special. Very briefly, he got a nasty reputation for having a wandering eye, he simply got bored so quickly. His rep recovered after many kids forgot he even went out with anyone. Why bother when Olette kept distracting him? Even when he did try to forget about her, she came back to the forefront of his mind.

Sometimes, when he's by himself like this, he can't lie: he thinks about her, almost fondly. Unfortunately, he can't get up the courage to talk to her now for some weird reason. Probably because he believes that Olette is way out of his league. She's smart and pretty and nice at least. A lot of girls seem to think nice is beneath them these days. Olette doesn't seem the type to follow trends. Riku about has to respect her for that, for having such a determined mind of her own. Even now, he smiles slightly at the thought of her.

Yeah, she has these pigtails, but they're hardly the ones you'd see on little girls. Maybe you can't call them pigtails at all. Her hair still brushes past her shoulders. Hm, and she has those incredible green eyes, a rare color to see in eyes any more.

Wait a second, he has to close his eyes for a minute to picture her and every last detail about her. Once he opens them again, his smile widens before he shakes his head. Nah, he doesn't do emotions. Not feelings like these, ones that give him this obvious thrill. Imagine if he tries speaking to her for longer than ten minutes. He could potentially ruin the magic that might be between them and the mystery she has.

Instead, Riku ignores his drooping eyes that feel as though weights are attached to the lashes and promptly grabs his cellphone from his nightstand. He'll call one of his friends, and it might as well be his best friend, who's normally up until two-something AM playing video games. While briefly waiting for his friend to answer, he hears a ringtone that's supposed to be a bad hip-hop song in all its autotuned glory. His friend's terrible like that, insisting on subjecting him to suffer through the worst ringtones.

Finally, he hears Demyx's voice ask, "What's up, man?"

"Eh, nothing much, dude. I'm bored."

Bored, hmph, that's understated enough. Even as he informs Demyx of this boredom, he stares up at the ceiling, painted dark blue like the four walls. It's always been his favorite color.

"I get you. I'm not doin' much myself. Hey, is that math test tomorrow?"

They, by interesting circumstance, have the same Algebra II class hour. Unfortunately for the perpetually fatigued Dem, he has a tendency to sleep through class. Riku himself barely manages to stay awake.

It's second hour, the worst possible time to have a math class with it still being morning and all that.

He nods. "Yeah, we do. I'm not studying either. I forgot to anyway."

"Shit, me too, Riku! Great...I'm already getting a D in that class. D+ anyway, and I have to get my grade up to a C. How 'bout you?"

Riku shrugs. "I'm getting a solid B."

"Daaaamn, you're sure smarter than you let on."

So he's been told. He can't help it, though. In spite of his hatred of school, he does have this ability to retain information. Not 100% of it, but he can get pretty close. It's enough to keep his mom happy.

"Thanks...I guess. So, how you doin'? I don't hear the PS3 going."

Hearing a chuckle on the other end, Riku too smiles at his attempt of a joke. But, it's so true. Dem has his console on so often that for it to be off is very uncanny. It leads Riku to ponder over the health of his friend.

Demyx admits, "I'm grounded. Bad grades again, that's why. So, if you're bored, I'm ten times worse. Oh, and I'm hearing my little bro playing _Halo _in his room right now. That pisses me off."

Riku grins, glad that he's all by himself. "Glad I'm an only child then. Thank God. Sucks to be you, Dem."

"Hey, Riku, don't be so cocky. Your mom could be pregnant soon."

Riku highly doubts it. His mom works at JC Penny as a clerk, so she knows first hand how expensive raising one kid is. Not to mention she's old. Like forty-two-years-old type of old. There's no way Mom can get pregnant again, even if she wanted to.

He laughs at Demyx. "Yeah, right. Unless you're a magician or something."

"You never know. It might be one of those freak things like sixty-year-olds getting pregnant. I saw that on the health channel once."

"You have an active imagination."

The two good friends (best friends since first grade) chat a little while longer about when a favorite band's new album is supposed to come out and how a Domino's pizza joint should be in this lousy excuse of a town. Or maybe a Steak and Shake or an Arby's. Because hell knows how overrated Hardee's is.

Demyx soon gets off, insisting that he's already in enough hot water with his parents and doesn't need to push things further. And heck with it, he'll study for math. Later, bro.

"Later," Riku says before hanging up his cellphone.

If he cares more, he'll study. But, he doesn't and he won't.

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><p><strong>AN: Math sucks. Glad I'm not taking it this year, ha! XD Well, this is kind of a slow start, but things pick up from the second chapter on. For now, this is just a background thing on Riku's personality and stuff.**


	2. Chapter 2: 7:50 AM, Monday

**A/N: OK, so we get to know more about Riku's family life and his opinion of Olette in this chapter. So, yes, finally I put the connection of Olette into this story. Well, not finally, it's only chapter 2 after all.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 2: 7:50 AM, Monday<strong>

_Beep, beep, beep!_ The alarm on his digital clock sounds off instead of Mom's voice. Probably because she trusts that he can wake himself up. Yeah, it's great to have someone who has faith in you. But, when it comes to waking yourself up...Well, it's not fun.

Ultimately, Riku ended up getting six hours of sleep, nowhere near enough hours to sleep through. His eyelids still feel heavy, and there's that Monday morning urge to fall back asleep, fake sick, and skip school. He wishes, just so he can miss out on that math test.

"Riku," Mom decides to call out after all. "Time to get up, sweetie."

OK, OK, but he doesn't have to like it. Not by a long shot. Very gradually, he gets up from bed in what feels like slow-motion. Can't do this...God, it needs to be Saturday again so he can sleep til ten. Blearily, he opens his closet and reaches inside to pick out a shirt. He's not particular about what it looks like, as long as it covers him. Such a lazy guy philosophy, but hey, it's morning. He deserves points for effort at any rate. Right before he goes downstairs, he grabs his gray hoodie from off the floor. These spring mornings are too cool to suit him.

By the time he gets to the kitchen, he notices Mom and Joel together at the table, finishing off the bacon, eggs, and toast she's cooked. Yep, a Joel in the house not a Dad. Dad ran off a long time ago, when Riku was around four or five. Quite a traumatizing experience if he remembers correctly. And he should be able to, considering it's not an everyday occurrence. With suitcases in hand, Dad left the house with barely a goodbye to his son, who remained in shock a week after that. Mom had had him stay home for a few days from preschool just to recover. She met Joel four years later, marrying a year after that.

Joel is OK. He's nice, and he's actually a pretty decent surrogate dad.

"Outdone yourself cooking breakfast again, Rachel," Joel compliments just as Riku invades the pantry to grab a couple Pop-Tarts, breakfast of champions. Or at the very least, tired teenagers desperate for a sugar high to stay awake on.

"Morning, Riku." Joel offers a smile.

He barely smiles back. "Hey, Joel."

It would be way more convenient if his stepdad is his real dad. That way, it wouldn't feel like they live on two separate planets sometimes. That's the trade-off for having Joel in this family. All in all, he's just some random guy.

He's done the whole playing catch with a baseball and the same thing with a football deal. The thing is, Riku is not that much into sports other than skateboarding these days. It's been that way since he was nine. Joel can really fail in relating to him.

Then again, he works in accounting. Of course they don't see eye to eye.

Joel then tacks on, "I've been telling your mom what an amazing cook she is."

"Oh, stop it." Mom blushes slightly. "It's not like I'm on the Food Network or anything like that. You better hurry up, Riku, you got about twenty minutes."

"Yeah, yeah," he murmurs distractedly, popping the Pop-Tarts into the toaster. They're strawberry, his favorite. Well, actually, he's not sure if he has a favorite. He doesn't eat Pop-Tarts for breakfast for enjoyment purposes, just for survival purposes. In reality, they're too sweet to be that appetizing. Either that or he should eat the s'mores flavored ones again. Whatever, they're quick and easy so he can get up close to eight o' clock without breakfast being too much of a hassle. Besides, he only lives a few blocks away from the high school anyway. Just another reason to be lazy.

"Did you get enough sleep last night?" Joel asks, curious in his fatherly way.

Riku nods, impatiently waiting for his Pop-Tarts to finish toasting. In thirty more seconds, they pop out like a spring. He holds back a yawn as he takes them out, puts them on a plate. A typical morning in his house, how boring. Mom and Joel act like they're the perfect couple like something off scripted TV shows. Everything seems to work out for them, even when they're doing something as simple as eating breakfast before he gets up. Their relationship is too perfect. It bothers him, probably because this has meant that he's had to rely on a different man to raise him. Let's face it, it gets complicated. His feelings on the matter do. There might still be a vacancy inside for the man who is really Dad.

Draining the last of his coffee in his cup, Joel puts it in the sink, adjusting his tie to prepare for another fun day in the accounting world.

"I'm off to work. See you later, honey." He kisses Mon on the corner of her mouth. Sick. Does this have to be in front of the seventeen-year-old kid? Cool it, Riku admonishes himself, you're just moody because it's Monday. Joel doesn't deserve this crap. No, if anything, he should be grateful to him for consistently sticking around in his life. In both their lives.

Joel, meanwhile, pats Riku's shoulder. "Have a good day, Riku."

"You too," he manages to mumble, making his stepdad grin just a bit wider, enough to cause him to relax his tense shoulders. Oh, now he remembers why this isn't so terrible. Joel's a genuine guy, a nice guy. He's off in a mood then after all, one of his why-the-heck-is-my-real-dad-not-around moods. Yeah, it's been thirteen years, but that sort of thing has its impact on a kid. When you're abandoned (not just ditched), it can get to you every now and then. Like that itch you can't scratch. You can, enough to move on for the time being, but it can come back with a vengeance. And really, why think about Dad any more? He calls once or twice a month and sends him cards with money on Christmas and his birthday.

Honestly, if Dad didn't do that or pay child support, Riku wouldn't have known the bastard existed. Oh, he remarried ('course, he would, too) to some blonde bimbo named Janet. Janet from Florida, land of sunshine, orange trees, and Disney World. Apparently, dear old Dad felt he needed an upgrade: from reliable SUV Mom to the Ferrari blonde. What really sets Riku on edge, though, what really gets him _pissed off _is that Dad and Janet from Florida have two kids together. Gracie and Jeremy—the girl is eleven and the boy is eight. He wishes they weren't real sometimes.

God, no wonder he shoves all this info out of his mind as much as possible.

The worst part is that his dad, The Bastard, seems to be a relatively nice guy as well. Riku can't hate him at all, as much as he has tried in the past, simply for that reason. If Dad had been a jerk entirely, then he could find that excuse. However, Dad is a kind guy who at least has called his sometimes resentful, sometimes heartbroken son. He's been a great father for his two kids, the half-siblings Riku is unsure about meeting. To be honest, he doubts he ever will, even when Gracie and Jeremy get to be in their teens, too. As for the divorce of his parents, well, that was the only time Dad had come back here.

He had the common decency to end things the way they inevitably had to, nothing sloppy about it. With this new family he has now, the one he's tried harder with, he hasn't up and left the two kids. Riku's seen photos of the two of them, basically the kind of kids you see in the sample photo when you buy a new picture frame. They're perfect with their light blond-brown hair and vivid blue eyes. Yeah, both of them managed to get Dad's eyes. And the blonde bimbo's, but who cares about her?

So, Dad has pretty much moved on from his old life, the life that used to have all three of them in the picture. This time around, he stays with his second family. Which sucks, because Riku remembers how he left his dad out in kindergarten drawings of his family: just him and Mom.

Finishing up his warm, almost sickly sweet strawberry Pop-Tarts, Riku goes up to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Not a big fan of his teeth, he could tell people that much. They're somewhat crooked to him, so he refrains from grinning on school picture days. Heck, he's surprised if he does smile properly in yearbook pictures any more. The lights are too bright, the guy taking the pictures too artistic (why else does he make kids move to match his vision?), and he can't help but feel self-conscious. It's just crooked teeth, though. Why should they worry him?

As for his hair, he never runs a comb through it in the mornings. As far as he's concerned, it's fine as is, the exact shape it's in from when he gets up.

Yeah, he may have grown it long, something his mom doesn't care too much for, but he washes it. Uses Herbal Essences, a girly shampoo, but it _is _effective.

So, that's it for morning personal hygiene. Time to get moving and get to stupid school, where he will most likely flunk that math test. He apathetically goes down the stairs with his khaki bookbag, because he could care less about today. His mind runs on auto pilot as he passes Mom, who wishes him a good day and good luck on that math test. He'll need the luck, but it might not be enough.

In a less than enthusiastic mood, he gets on his bike to ride the four blocks to school. He doesn't have a car, not yet anyway, just his license. However, Mom has hinted not so subtly that he could get one for his eighteenth birthday. But, that's eleven months yet—his birthday was just this past March, last month. Speaking of which, Dad had sent him a card with money but also, shockingly, a letter. It said that he hoped Riku had a great birthday and that he was getting along OK in school.

Yeah, he is, thanks for the concern, Dad. Dad also mentioned how he'd been doing (a couple paragraphs of that, blah-blah) and suggested that Riku should come down to Florida in the summer. Oh, hell no, like that's gonna happen.

The second bell rings by the time he walks inside the school building, fairly good timing considering he'd had to put his bike in the bike rack. It's still the you-better-hurry-up-and-get-to-class bell, meaning he only has five minutes. Heck with it, he's made it on time before with two or three minutes left to go. As he walks along at an easy stride toward his locker, he sees faces. Some girls standing around talking, chewing gum, with their faces wearing an excessive amount of make-up and their jean cut-off shorts dangerously short. Hitched up any higher, and Riku might glimpse some parts he'd rather not see. He prefers to preserve his innocence in that respect, even if freshman year health class took some of it away.

Why do girls want to show so much of themselves in public? Personally, he's all for leaving a lot to the imagination. He likes mystery in a girl, a girl who wouldn't make it seem obvious. A girl who would refuse to have her shorts up high to within an inch of exposing her hips. Riku shakes his head at all these classless girls before he reaches his locker at last. There're other faces he casually notices during his locker pit stop, people from his grade. He doesn't acknowledge them due to him somewhat being a stranger in a strange land.

They don't say hi to him, most of them. And, he thinks with a pang as he evenly strides toward his first class, neither does she.

Yep, there's Olette, that one special, un-slutty girl walking down the hall in the opposite direction. Riku guesses she has an excuse for not saying hi: she's smart but honestly, really shy. He's shy around girls too, so they're pretty much evenly matched. But, God, she's so stunning. Obviously, he appreciates it when girls (some of them anyway) wear little make-up.

She never wears any, and that's a natural beauty he can admire. They share one of their usual moments, eyes locking in a tender stare, neither one of them saying anything. Not even hi. Riku continues on to Spanish class.

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><p><strong>AN: I would like to think there are teen guys out there who appreciate girls for personality and not solely based on looks. In this way, maybe I'm looking at the glass a little too half full. At the same time, though, I know there are guys out there like this, though they're few and far between. Most of them at that age would go for a girl who wears hardly anything at all during the summer, spring, and maybe fall months.**

**However, let's say that what occurred in Riku's early life has made him a bit more mature than most. I guess. XD**


	3. Chapter 3: 3:46 PM, Monday

**A/N: So, yeah, recently this past summer, I watched skateboarding on TV once after I saw Harry Potter 7 (or 8, I guess) and loved watching it. Cuz, here's the thing. On for two hours at a time AT MOST and there's action. And it can be surprising. And I'm like, "Finally, a sport that's actually fun to watch". At least for me. This is where I got some of the terms, too.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 3: 3:46 PM, Monday<strong>

Leaping up onto the stair railing with the greatest of ease, Demyx proceeds to grind on it a little before sticking his landing and doing a small kickflip just for show. The other guys mockingly pretend to applaud him for his effort.

Dem bows. "Thank you. Thank you, gentlemen, I'll be here tomorrow."

"Same time, same place?" Axel asks sarcastically, his lips quirking into a smirk.

"Sure, yeah. It's not like I got anything else to do."

"Like homework," Terra snorts.

These three guys along with himself make up Riku's crew, and they've been together since late elementary school/early middle school, 'round that era.

Having his crew of friends around is one of the key components in his life, he feels. They've been there through some rough times. Like when Axel's mom died of breast cancer when the poor guy was just twelve. And like when he, Riku, got the news via a telephone call that his dad would remarry. What was the kicker was that Dad would have "very much liked it if he could come."

When the invitation had gotten sent out, he promptly crumpled it up and tossed it. So, throughout a great deal of angst, they stuck together. That's what you do when you're in a crew. Not only do you skate, you have each other's backs. Always.

Skateboarding means a lot to Riku and reminds him of breathing, how effortless it is for him. Without it, he wouldn't know what else to do for a sport. It's not as strongly his life as music is, but it's up there.

Currently, the four of them, four juniors, are hanging out near the back of McDonald's, where there's a set of steps and, of course, a rail out back. They might have been told to leave once or twice, but otherwise, none of the employees really care. Neither does the manager for that matter. All they're concerned about is selling burgers, fries, and McFlurries. For profit. If a bunch of ragtag skaters won't be customers, then fine. That's their business. Meantime, the McDonald's business goes on.

Riku takes his turn on the rail, doing a switch trick as he's going down. He lands it but staggers just slightly.

Axel jokes, "What's the matter, Riku? You drunk?"

Flipping back his silver hair (that he got from his _father_) from his face, he tells him in response, "Nah, I don't get drunk. Are you?"

"Ohhh, you better watch it! I'm six foot two, I could kill you." The redhead laughs out loud, causing Riku to smirk.

"Let's see you try, dude. 'Sides, I'm five eleven, not much shorter."

Demyx and Terra only look on, amused expressions on both their faces.

After they take a few more turns grinding on the rail and trying to do massive flips over the steps, they resolve to take a break. The four boys soon retreat into McDonald's, and Riku and Terra order snacks there. Riku, an Oreo McFlurry, and a Reese's peanut butter cup one for Terra. Ignoring strange glances from some customers (some of them saw them skate out back), they pick a table at the back corner to sit.

Demyx starts the conversation. "So, I pretty much flunked that test."

Oh yeah. The test. How can Riku forget? At one point while taking it, he blankly stared at the test sheet, stuck on a problem or two. Or, actually, about five on that whole sheet. What? Had they even talked about this stuff? Oh hell, he would pick C throughout this set—it wouldn't be for the rest of the test. Besides, that method works for him, has worked often in the past.

"Yeah, me too. Math sucks anyway." Riku shrugs.

"Aaaamen," Axel drawls.

Terra nods. "Algebra especially. When the hell are we gonna use it in our lives? I doubt I need to pay my taxes with x and y."

The other three guys chuckle out of agreement. Maybe it's a bit of a stereotype that they, as skaters, aren't big fans of math, much less school. But, in their case, it's totally true. Screw school. Screw this town! At the same time, though, Riku has enough common sense to stay, to tentatively hold on to this until graduation. And hopefully, so do his friends. He looks at them and suddenly has this surge of gratitude for having them with him. They're his brothers. They really are, and they sure won't ditch him, unlike Dad.

He shakes his head, thinking what a sap he is. "On second thought, I might have done decent."

Three pairs of eyes ogle him in disbelief, not because his friends doubt his intelligence but because they all thought that that test was frickin' hard. Riku laughs at their faces.

"What? I just mean I might have passed it with a D. Guess I'll have to study next time. I'm not that much of a dork, but you know."

"That's aight," Demyx spoke up. "We're all dorks here. Axel still looks up at the sky at night, waiting for a Jedi Knight to come down and—"

Axel cuts in, "Oh, shut up, Dem. You keep wishing you're Napoleon Dynamite."

Laughing almost, Terra tries not to let his McFlurry fall off his spoon. "And I still wet the bed."

Dead silence.

"Kidding! God, guys, I'm seventeen years old. My brother's the one who still wets the damn bed."

"And he's...six, right?" Axel attempts to puzzle that one over.

The brunet shakes his head. "Eight."

"I feel bad for him," Demyx says out of real pity.

Riku grins, tossing his hair back. "Feel bad for me. I was nine when I stopped."

They all roar into laughter once more, disregarding people's stares.

Later, just as the sun is setting, Riku skates on home, where he had stopped earlier to retrieve the skateboard in the first place. Skateboarding first, homework second. That has been his motto for nearly as long as he can remember. Mom, often as not, gets disappointed in him because of his dedication to that motto. She never went to college, that's why disappointment is called for, apparently. And in this crap economy, something has to give. For Riku, he has to give up four more years for college and schooling. By nature, he's a dreamer, but he's also realistic. He knows the whole musician thing won't work out. So, if push comes to shove (and that's likely), he'll become a party clown. There, that'll work.

But, seriously, what will he do with his life if he can't become a musician? This could be the perfect scene in a coming-of-age movie, like _Dazed __and __Confused _or something. He guesses he could open a record sto—oh wait, those are dying out. Damn. Well, he's decent at art.

Or he could get some random job like exterminating. Nah, too many cockroaches involved in that job. He might have had it the first time with art as the fall-back job. Hm, he considers that he could go into graphic design, and he can do just fine with that. It involves computers too, so it's current.

When he gets home, Riku smells dinner cooking on the stovetop, and it smells like French onion soup. Mom likes to experiment with recipes when she cooks, like a chemist can experiment with formulas. That's what chemists do, right? Anyway, like those chemist dudes, she's good at what she does with her experiments.

Finished with thinking about his career opportunities, Riku comes right in to the kitchen to help set the table. He's just in time. He puts the bowls at their spots while she ladles some soup into each one.

Mmmm...Joel's right, Mom is an excellent cook. And no matter what she denies, she can be on the Food Network. He won't admit it, but Riku is a full-fledged mama's boy.

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><p><strong>AN: Not much more to say here. Just that it was fun for me writing this chapter. It's actually one of the few light ones in this story, that's probably why. That, and it was just an excuse for me to talk about food. XD**

**Til my next update, see ya.**


	4. Chapter 4: 1:31 PM, Tuesday

**A/N: In which Riku deals with all the pent-up resentment he feels toward his dad. So, I guess you can say here comes the angst. Enjoy, even if it is angst. XD**

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><p><strong>Chapter 4: 1:31 PM, Tuesday<strong>

Someone kill him now. Seriously, please. Literally, he will pay some whacko to come up to him with a gun and blow his brains out. Riku's brains, not the whacko's. OK, maybe his thoughts are getting a bit overdramatic, more so than a guy's should be.

Here's the thing, though. Something happened last night to interrupt his relatively peaceful evening of homework and TV. It was a Monday night, and usually, nothing too eventful ever happens then. Riku was doing his homework while his TV had _Rob __Dyrdek__'__s __Fantasy __Factory_on. He loves that show since it has two of his favorite things: random comedy and skateboarding.

Then, Mom got a phone call while he was halfway through his dull English assignment. A poetry unit...such bull. And she must have told Joel not to answer it, because he heard just her voice talking on the phone.

"Riku, it's your dad! He wants to talk to you!" she called up toward his room.

Oh yeah, the monthly phone call. It came at weird timing, considering that Dad had a preference for calling on weekends. Was there any urgent news?

Did Janet from Florida drop dead?

Real nice, asshole, he scolded himself inwardly before taking the phone.

What did Janet ever do to him besides becoming Dad's second wife and popping out two perfect, picture frame sample kids? Oh yeah, about that...

"How you doing, son?" Dad asked all the way from bright, sunny Florida.

He was half-tempted to say eff you. "Pretty good, I guess"—then, stupidly—"I'm doing my English homework."

"Oh. Well, great to know you're keeping up with your grades."

"Yeah, sure." Get to the point, Dad.

He heaved another breath. "Listen, Riku, do you remember what I mentioned in my letter about how I think you should come down here this summer?"

"Uh-huh." Not going, not planning on it, Steve, you dumbass.

"Well, my offer still stands," Dad continued, clearing his throat as though he was a bit nervous. "I would really like for you to come down, even if it's just for a day. I feel terrible for not suggesting it sooner."

Riku was surprised that he growled out, "Good."

Dad let out another shaky sigh. "I'm sorry that I put you through this. But, I want to be a part of your life, more than just sending you money and letters. That was me being a coward all these years. Let me show you that I...as your father...care about you. Please, I would like it if you—"

"Hell no!" Riku hadn't expected to raise his voice either. It just slipped.

His grip unconsciously tightened on the receiver, so that was how upset he was over this. Obviously, he must have shocked Dad too, because he heard nothing from the other end. Just a long, awkward silence, probably involving even more guilt on his part. Good. Because, as far as Riku was concerned, dear ole Dad deserved it.

The old fart tried again. "Look, you haven't even met the kids or Ja—"

"I don't want to meet them!" Riku shouted, partially lying through his teeth. After all, he does have a curiosity to meet them.

It's not like he hasn't thought about getting to know that whole other family, the stepfamily he hasn't technically met yet. But, there was no way Riku would give his father what he wanted so easily.

He raged on, "I don't want to meet the kids, honestly. And I definitely don't want to meet that whore you left Mom for! How old is she? Twenty-five? Whatever, I don't care. There's no way in hell I'll even go near Florida. So, shut up and piss off, you bastard!"

As soon as he slammed the receiver down on the cradle, he knew he'd gone too far. Not only had he used strong language, but it was like he had made a big effort to alienate Dad from his life.

Moodily doing his algebra homework, Riku dwells on that night, and he can't believe it hasn't been a whole twenty-four hours yet. Yelling at his dad sure didn't solve anything. In fact, he remembers Mom asking him if he was OK. No, not really, but he lied anyway just like he directly did to Dad.

He'd love to meet Gracie and Jeremy in his heart of hearts, because he can't deny they're cute kids. The thing is, it hurts him that both of them have lived a charmed life. They live in this suburban town twenty minutes outside of Miami, are pretty well-off in terms of money, and have both parents under one roof. When he was their age, he met Joel but lived with only Mom.

The lucky rugrats don't know how good they have it, Riku thinks dourly, his eyes fighting sleep. Yeah. He barely got to sleep last night, and when he did, it was around one o'clock in the morning. Thoughts of Dad had kept him awake, haunting him to the point he could hardly stand it. Guilt, stinging as a hot stove, followed him to bed.

He's just lucky that it wasn't a face-to-face conversation. Otherwise, the guilt would have been much worse. Was using strong language against his own father necessary? He didn't cuss around his own mother like that.

As if he isn't suffering enough, Riku gets these very brief flashbacks of happier times. Hm, it's weird how he can kind of remember them, considering he was a preschooler at the time.

But, here it all is, a parade of memories in his mind. Dad taking him to the park. Dad pushing him on the swing. Dad pretending to "get his nose", something he was stupid enough to believe. Dad reading to him every now and again.

Dad with a few leather suitcases. Dad...

"Bastard," Riku whispers under his breath, abruptly feeling this stinging in his eyes. It's annoying, so he puts his math aside.

Leave it to him to screw it all up, taking his anger out on one of the men he has a son's affection for, the other being Joel. He can't change who his father is, though. For that reason, he regrets being such an ass to Dad, who has tried to make things good. Maybe he's making some headway.

In the last ten or so minutes of study hall, his class is allowed to talk. Hayner, who sits nearby, turns around in his seat.

"Hey, Riku, 'sup?"

"Um...nothing much, Hayner."

Hayner is an all right guy to talk to, even if he isn't a part of the crew.

However, Riku refuses to be the type to be so exclusive and be like "I'm not gonna associate with anyone outside my clique." No, not hardly. If anything, he welcomes more friends. Over a couple of years, Hayner has become one of them.

"Actually...My dad called last night. He said I really oughta go down to Florida for the summer. I got pissed at him and yelled at him."

Hayner knows some of what goes on in Riku's life, considering he doesn't mind being an open book to people he trusts.

Wincing, Hayner replies sympathetically, "Yeah, I don't blame you for that. But, how bad did you vent?"

"Pretty bad. I called him a bastard."

"Oooh...It'll all be OK, though. Your old man won't blame you either."

Riku glances down toward his desk, as though he's seeking guidance from it. How come the one time he'd been impulsive, he'd been a terrible person?

In a moment of vulnerability, he asks, "Really?"

Hayner nods. "Yeah, man. Your dad won't give up on you."

That's been the best thing Riku has heard all day, since he assumes that it's true. Dad is trying to mend their relationship. And he might welcome that.

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><p><strong>AN: Well, Riku's slowly but surely thinking that maybe he needs to forgive his dad at some point. A bit of trivia: him thinking it's stupid that there's a poetry unit in English class was also what Olette thought in the previous story. Did that purposely. But hey, there really shouldn't be a whole unit, OK? XD**

**See you guys next weekend.**


	5. Chapter 5: 4:23 PM, Tuesday

Chapter 5: 4:23 PM, Tuesday

"Your mom talked to you, huh? I thought she'd leave you alone after what happened last night," Demyx remarks over his shoulder.

It's only a brief second he looks over at Riku, though, because he's rather involved with playing _Call __of __Duty _right now. Trying to shoot the crap out of the bad guys or whatever, video game gore flying all over the place. Crazy kid, Riku thinks as he shakes his head. It may not be surprising, but Dem digs the _Resident __Evil _games, too. A crapload of zombies, and that means even more gore.

His best friend is one crazy, bloodthirsty weirdo.

Not really into playing war video games (he has a preference for _Rock __Band _and games like that along with _Halo_), Riku just quietly sits on Dem's bed, musing to himself. Distracted by his thoughts, he barely hears what his best friend says.

"What?"

"Your mom...She was talking to you earlier, you said?"

Riku recovers himself. "Um, yeah, she did. About an hour ago."

And this is why he ended up here. To be away from Mom.

Once he came in, throwing his khaki bag carelessly toward the floor, she confronted him about the phone call. However, she took the gentle approach, considering the rarity of Riku's outbursts, which are relatively few if any. He is usually seen by others as a constantly calm kid. Anyway, Mom told him gently that he shouldn't go around resenting Dad forever. That a life filled with resentment and unforgiving is not worth living. That he should show some humility by forgiving his father instead of carrying the bitter anger for fourteen more years. And why not get out of the house this summer by going to Florida?

Riku promptly responded that none of it mattered to him and he'd be at Demyx's.

So, he tells his closest friend the whole story, causing Demyx to sigh. "She has a point, you know. I mean, yeah, what your dad did wasn't cool, but now, he wants to start over."

"He already did. With a blonde yoga instructor whore," he spits out.

"Dude...Riku, don't be like that. You never even met the lady."

Suddenly, Riku snaps, "I don't have to!"

"Come _on_, you don't think other kids have been through the same thing? There're a lot of them without their fathers around, you know? If my parents were divorced, I'd still be open enough to include both of them in my life."

"Lucky you." And he starts sulking.

Loud gun shots and yelling from the TV stop as Demyx pauses his game. Eventually, he sits next to Riku on the bed.

"You're hurting about it, aren't you?" he mentions comfortingly. "I need to tell you that it gets better. It sucks at first, but if there's a parent with a whole other family, it gets better. Having a stepfamily, I mean. It'll be OK. Your dad still loves you."

"Hope so." In turn, Riku's voice sounds tired, strained.

Dem pats his back. "Don't sweat it, man. Forget about the emotions that get to you."

Emotions suck. Quite honestly, they get in the way sometimes, especially since he'd much rather just be this calm, happy kid. So, he can assume now that his mom is right and so is Demyx. Both of them actually seem to know more than he does, have more of a clue about his life. Or, at the very least, how to deal with the rough patches in life.

Riku frowns contemplatively. "Yeah...Yeah, I gotta stop acting like such a girl about it. I've been getting too emotional here lately."

"I wouldn't go that far. But, you have to let go of the hate."

"I know. Hey, Dem? Thanks."

Dem grins. "If I didn't make you uncomfortable, then I haven't been doing my job."

Relaxing all that tenseness he's been holding, Riku understands what his friend is getting at. Demyx has forced him to face the decision that he should make, the one that would make the most sense. It's a mature choice: manning up and being on good terms with Dad again.

So, this has been what Mom tried to tell him, too. It's weird how, when he hears the same, exact thing from his friends, it all makes sense. It's all the difference. He regrets being an idiot toward Mom.

"You really are a lifesaver, you know that?" Riku asks rhetorically.

"Now you're just being a sap."

Typical Demyx, always blunt and straight to the point. This makes him smile, because he really knows that this is the dude's way of trying to cheer him up. It works without a hitch, as it does every time.

So, he smiles, laughs slightly. "I am. But I mean it. You make it sound so easy, me getting along with Dad again."

"It is that easy...if you give him a chance."

Riku considers this bit of advice. All right, he might take it in the future.

After all, he hasn't exactly been enjoying his life with the long-held resentment he has (or had) for Dad. Grudging, day by day, has taken a little bit out of him and a little bit more out of him. Better anger than vulnerability, he once thought, better to just carry on this way than to break down. Breaking down wasn't manly.

"I could, I guess," he responds nonchalantly, not letting on that he'll finally take it to heart. "I've spent, like, ten years of my life being pissed off. I can't really...I don't see any point in being that way any more, not after last night."

Demyx gives him a fist bump. "Yeah, good for you. Now, will you go on home and stop being pissy around your mom?"

It's not like this has technically been any of Dem's business, but they are good buds and he assumes he could have the right to know. Might as well. They even know what's on their minds at any given moment. They can read each other. Maybe Demyx has a point. Mom would be too concerned over him taking out his emotions on her.

"You're right again. See you later, Dem." Riku pats him on the shoulder by way of showing his affection. Actually, he sees physically touching people—well, his friends—as a good way to prove how much he values them. Sometimes, words don't need to come into play. He wishes he could show Olette that...

When he gets home, Mom has started setting out ingredients in order to start cooking supper shortly. Over in the next room, Joel, who's come home early, watches TV. Sounds like he's channel surfing. It's little things like these that make this house a home. Dad may no longer be in the picture, but this home is no longer broken but whole. Thank God that Joel helped to pick up the pieces and arrange them into something a little bit better.

Immediately, Mom looks up at him, her eyes vaguely worried. "Oh, Riku, you're back already. I thought you were going to eat with Demyx and his family."

Hm, well, that hadn't been Riku's initial plans at all, but he did think he was going to stay at Dem's longer. But, he can't ruin his mom's evening by not talking to her or avoiding her. What good would it do?

He shakes his head. "No, I didn't think about it."

"Oh," Mom says again. "I had figured that since you were angry..."

And now, he's far from it, regaining his normal calm and composure that he has missed over the past day. He's really sorry about what has resulted from it. With that in mind, he comes up to Mom and hugs her. "Nah, I'm not really that mad any more. I was just confused."

He had been. He was. But, he's not any more, now that everything is clear.


	6. Chapter 6: 3:04 PM, Wednesday

**A/N: Due to my birthday yesterday (number 19, can you believe it?), I didn't upload. Today, I will. Hopefully.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 6: 3:04 PM, Wednesday<strong>

It's the day he knew something would happen. Something he hoped would be brilliant and could make him beyond happy. Yeah, he is satisfied with his life with what he has as family along with great friends, but a real girlfriend would make him feel unstoppable. By a real girlfriend, he means that she would be a girl who would be like a best friend but also someone to love. To care about. And he's felt something for Olette ever since middle school. She talked to him once that particular eighth grade year, shy and sweet. The sun hit her brown hair just right and her eyes...Oh God, those beautiful green eyes that met his so readily. They had sucked him in. He thinks he might have blushed.

Earlier this day, he almost did when their eyes met during first morning passing period. Then, again soon after the lunch bell rang, and she accidentally bumped into him. Why does she fear him so much? She acts near scared to death of him some days. Is it something he does? Or is she getting caught up in her shyness? Either way he looks at it, Riku is more than tempted to break down the wall that divides them, the wall between honors students and regular ones. So what if she's smart? There's totally nothing wrong with that.

However, he perceives her one way, but she obviously perceives herself a different way.

Actually, he corrects himself as he puts a couple notebooks in his khaki bookbag, maybe the wall is there just because they're shy. Both of them. They've been shy around each other for God knows how long. More than ever, he wants to clear his throat and be able to talk with her about anything, even the frickin' weather! Even if he's never made the first move before. Riku lets out a sigh, unconsciously looks over his shoulder...

...And sees pretty, smart, and perfectly amazing Olette head toward his locker. Out of a frenzy of nerves, he finds himself needing to finish packing up his bag. Oh, forget about tearing down walls for the time being. He is getting anxious out of his mind at the thought of conversation.

Riku doesn't know what the heck is wrong with him, and he'll be the first to admit it. He has friends who are girls, sure. Around them, he can talk as much as he likes. But, Olette is different. In so many ways. He wants to impress her, to be able to welcome her into his world. If his hands would stop shaking and if he could say even a word, he would show her just that.

Instead, a strained "Yeah?" is all that comes out, frustrating him to no end. What does he _do _in this situation? His stomach is doing backflips and somersaults currently. A certain sixth sense tells him that he ought to listen to what the girl is saying. There is something to get out of this.

That much is true when Olette reveals that she likes him, really likes him. Apparently, she has no interest in any other guy in the meantime. It's _him_, only him. It must have been for quite a while now. Despite the pounding in his ears, he feels his heart ache when she's being skeptical. He hears the sad softness in her voice when she mentions she thinks he might not feel the same way apart from her dreams. His face hidden by his hair, Riku is acutely aware that Olette won't see the small smile playing on his lips. So, she dreams of him? Ironic, since he sometimes dreams of her.

At that pivotal moment, he wonders if two people who happen to dream of each other dream it at the same time. Has a study ever backed that assumption up? He almost hopes so, considering that if it is true, it would be like getting closer to her. Like during the second time they ever talked last year, when their fingers had been just inches shy of touching. In fact, if memory serves, Olette had been the one to grasp his hand for a few short seconds before abruptly withdrawing it. Her cheeks burned red from blushing. And she has such a cute blush.

All in all, Riku is godsmacked that Olette has revealed her feelings for him to the extent that he stays silent. He can't move.

But, then, the flicker of happiness comes, the feeling that this isn't a dream but it's real. All he has wanted in her will come to fruition.

Unfortunately, Olette ends up saying, "Sorry I wasted your time, Riku."

Wait, no, you didn't. Those words bubble to the surface, but it's like he has no vocal cords along with his lips feeling like they're glued together. Inwardly, he screams at himself to say something, anything, just make this girl happy. Make her happy, because God knows what might be going on with her life now. He has noticed her not even smiling at him the past week. It troubles him. So, damn it, be a man and say something, anything...Too late, Olette leaves after her quick apology.

Oh no, she thinks he doesn't like her! How could he not like her, what with all these positive, glowing qualities she possesses? This is way worse than he has assumed, her insecurity. She's not even giving him a chance, because she has jumped to the conclusion that he won't give her one.

_Oh_, _Olette, __you__'__re __giving __yourself __hell, __and __you __have __no __idea __how __or __why __you__'__re __doing __it_, he thinks out of concern.

"Olette, wait!" he tries to speak up, but she's getting further and further away.

Slamming his locker closed, Riku races down the hallway and pushes past other kids, determined to get his say. But, it feels like Olette is walking faster herself, because she's moving past her fair share of students. However, he is not deterred in the least bit. He's got to get to her somehow, some way, or so help him God. It doesn't matter when he gets home from school—he lives four blocks away. As for her, she must live streets away.

At one point, though, he practically runs into a large clique of slow-moving freshmen aka the kids who take up a lot of hallway space and move at the pace these kids are moving now. Riku bites back a snarl, frustrated that this should happen now of all times. If it had been any other day...

"Olette!" he shouts over the freshmen heads, louder this time. It's like he doesn't exist because at this point, she's out the main doors.

All right, no more Mr. Nice Guy. As much as he hates deviating from his normally civil self, he shoves the freshmen out of the way to get to the main doors himself. There, finally, now maybe he can catch up with her. His heart soon sinks, however, when he sees the bright sun hitting on her brunette head, which is far off. She's running as fast as her legs can take her to her car.

There's no way in hell he's giving up as he sprints toward the parking lot, his breathing getting short. Jeez, is he really getting worn-out already?

It's too late. She gets into her car, which he has actually spotted her driving around before. He smiled at her then, because she looked at peace and even right at home in that Taurus. His heart skips a beat even now, but he has to keep...

She's pulling out of her spot now.

"Shit!" he yells before proceeding to curse himself out for messing everything up, both for himself and Olette, the girl he honestly cares about. It's everything! His lack of reaction when she told him how she felt, him not saying anything, and him trying to get her to listen to him too late.

In effect, he has...ruined her life or at least a tiny part of it, maybe not much.

It's enough to make her feel like...well, you-know-what, right? Take that along with the obviously low self-esteem she has already, and she must be borderline depressed. Or worse.

Just his bike at the bike rack when he gets to it. It emptied out rather quickly like it always does. He sits by it, cradling his head in his hands. He's an asshole for not being the guy Olette expected him to be. Right? He let her down, badly. How can he forgive himself?

A strong stinging, as if Riku has been exposed to too many onions, is threatening his eyes. For some reason, he has this strong urge to cry, when it's not even necessary. He needs to be a man about this, toughen up. It's just that he has this nearly ominous feeling about how things got messed-up today. Like he might not see her at school tomorrow, and it would be all his fault. His heart sinks down to his stomach, where he might be a bit nauseous. Yeah, he ran, but where had that led him?

He can't be happy any more today, because that will feel wrong on so many levels. Especially with Olette's disappointment on his plate.

Riku runs his hands through his hair, his fingers knotting in the long strands. Another wave of nausea overwhelms him. A heavy pang strikes him in his heart. Maybe he cares more about Olette than he previously thought. It has been something he has never felt for any other girl, before or since. Why does he have this...foreboding sense...that he...?

Looking up toward the source of a tall shadow, he shades his eyes against that tauntingly bright sun. Yep, there's Demyx standing over him.

"Hey, man," Riku murmurs, sniffing for the sake of distracting himself.

Maybe he's getting some nice springtime allergies, which is most likely. He's the type who gets easily affected by them.

Dem waves. "Sup? It's, like, fifteen after. We were wondering if you bailed."

On the skate? For once, Riku is too miserable, even to hang out and skateboard as usual. It would be good for him, though. Pretending that nothing happened.

To say the least, he's bummed, out of it. "I think I might, actually. You know, Olette came up to me earlier and talked to me."

"Oh, cool. That's the girl you like, right?"

Dem knows to some degree about his crush on Olette. But, they're guys, so it's not like they've ever gone in-depth about it or anything.

Half-absentmindedly, Riku plays with his shoelace. "Yeah, she told me she liked me. And I didn't say anything cuz I was...I was shocked, you know? She seemed to think I didn't like her at all and ran off. I tried to catch up to her but...Look where that's got me."

"I wouldn't worry about it." Demyx sits down next to him, pats him on the shoulder comfortingly. "You can just tell her how you feel tomorrow. It's some misunderstanding now, but it can be fixed."

What if there won't be a tomorrow? Oddly enough, Riku feels like asking his friend this. But, he won't. It's too morbid a question to put a voice to.

His skepticism causes him to shake his head. He's just so unsure of what will happen tomorrow. This ain't an ordinary Wednesday.

So, in a resigned tone, he says, "I don't think I'll hang with you guys. I'd have an off day skating anyway."

Demyx nods, understanding. "OK. See you later, Riku. Feel better, OK?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'll be all good by tomorrow."

He hopes so. More than anything in the world, he hopes so. Because if there's reason to have a sense of foreboding, he'll be haunted.

After dinner that evening, he watches TV with Joel while Mom reads in the corner of the living room. He says nothing, only wondering how Olette holds up. Hopefully, he hasn't hurt her too much.

"Riku. Riku, you OK?" Joel asks.

Riku smiles, even though he's feeling far from happy. "Yeah, I'm good."

"All right, just wasn't sure. You've been quiet...well, quieter than usual."

He chuckles. "Yeah, I know. It's just...this girl..."

"Ah, so you got a little crush?" Joel looks at him knowingly.

Riku nods, self-consciously gulping because of this apprehension he has. He has this feeling that...He might not see her again.

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><p><strong>AN: Oooh, could this be a case of foreshadowing? In the next chapter or maybe the chapter after that (depends on which one you believe), you will all find out.**


	7. Chapter 7: 11:53 PM, Wednesday

**A/N: Hey, guys, what's up? It took me forever to fix the close-up italics in this thing. Site's fault, not mine. Luckily, it was only just a paragraph that needed fixing. I hope. XD**

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><p><strong>Chapter 7: 11:53 PM, Wednesday<strong>

It's a dream that does it. In a way, it causes the dam to break, a flood washing over him. It's like he is practically drowning. To be honest, there's no way that this is an ordinary dream. Usually, if he has dreams, they're more on the light-hearted side. Like images of him getting up on the Madison Square Garden stage, looking out toward about 40,000 concert-goers ready to rock. Like the time he's dreamed of Demyx robbing a bank with a banana rather than a gun. Like his high school turning into a prison, and the same loose girls scoffing at the fact they had to wear the orange prison jumpsuits. So unfashionable! How could he have a bizarre dream like this?

_It __starts __with __Riku __skateboarding __across __town, __passing __the __video __rental __place, __McDonald__'__s, __K-Mart, __and __the __library. __The __small __post __office,__the __music __store __fading __fast, __and __the __police __department. __All __this __time, __he __stays __on __the __skateboard, __cruising __the __cracked __sidewalks __simply __because __he __has __nothing __better __to __do. __He __keeps __cruising __until __he __comes __across __the __out-of-city-limits __park, __where __there__'__re __man-made __lakes. __It__'__s __a __location __where __people __like __to __jog, __go __fishing, __and __feed __the __geese. __The __occasional __bird __watcher __might __show __up._

_Instead, once he arrives there, Riku sees nobody. No one standing on the old wooden bridge, no cars up by the rangers' station. If anything, it is seriously deserted except for him. He thinks he might hear some birds, but they sound too far away._

_It's a perfectly sunny day, though, now. When he was back at town, there'd been clouds and a stray shower. Here, bright as day. Letting his eyes travel across the landscape, Riku takes it all in. Two lakes he can see that are nearby, and the grass is a nice spring green. A few trees off in the distance, the sun disappearing behind a fog..._

_Wait, whoa, a fog?_

_And then, Riku hears footsteps head his way, sneakers flat on the paved pathway._

_Much to his astonishment, Olette emerges from the increasingly heavier fog, which is starting to be a joke. It's like it comes from a smoke machine that you could find at any old dance club. Or an N*SYNC concert, hmph._

_Her green eyes look so large, so innocent. "Hey, Riku. How are you?"_

"_Um...fine," he speaks nervously, wanting to get a closer look at her._

_Because, he swears, she is barely there, her small form almost translucent to him. If he touches her, she could fall apart as though she's nothing more than dust. This is an Olette he is honest to God scared of._

_A light smile settles on her lips. "That's good. I'm glad you're doing well."_

_Are you? He is compelled to ask. The brightest part about her right now is those eyes, large and innocent. Along with that innocence, though, there is an indescribable sadness, older beyond her years._

_Just seeing that she is in pain cuts right through him._

"_Are you OK?" he asks, his voice barely above a whisper._

_She shrugs, one shoulder hitching above the other. "Depends on what you mean. Emotionally, I am. But, physically..."_

_Oh God._

"_I'm dead."_

_No, don't say that! How the hell could this happen? This may be a dream turning into a nightmare, but somehow, Riku finds himself believing that this is true. At the same time, he can't. He just saw her earlier this afternoon. She's fine._

_He can't see the structure through the fog, but he notices her hand pointing toward the old wooden bridge. "I jumped off there."_

_He shakes his head, blocking his ears to her voice. "No, you didn't. Stop making up stories, Olette! You're scaring the hell out of me."_

"_It's not a story if it's true," Olette replies quietly._

_His hands beginning to shake, Riku promptly removes them from his ears. Then, he is filled with this aching, terrible sorrow. His heart breaks at the thought that she could be really dead. He likes (liked) her, deeply. If they'd gotten to know each other more, it would have been love. Maybe not the forever kind of love, but it would have been first love. It might have seen them through to college. Who knows? It's ended now._

_A tremor is in his voice when he murmurs, "This is my fault. If I'd said something to you—about how I like you back—you wouldn't be..."_

_She touches his shoulder. "It's not your fault. It was a lot of things."_

_Like what? What did the intelligent, pretty honors student have to deal with to lead her to do something as drastic as this? Suicide is not the way out, should never be the way out. If this is true, then she decided to take it. To jump off that bridge, to drown in that lake._

_He shuts his eyes. "Like what?"_

"_I never had that much of a social life, Riku. I would have been seventeen in the summer without ever having a boyfriend."_

"_You don't—didn't—know that."_

_Olette continues, "And it's not even that. It's the fact I was lonely. My friends were happy that they had lives, even on weekends. It's the fact I felt inadequate since middle school. And...And my parents were gonna divorce"—her eyes well up with tears—"Because Dad had an affair. Everything was falling apart for me."_

_The sad feeling in Riku's heart expands. There's a better way to deal with all that. There is. Before he really thinks about it, he wraps his arms around her, settling his chin on top of her head. Not only is he comforting her, but he's trying to comfort himself. He still can't make sense of what she has told him. With all these details, this has to be true, no doubt._

_All the while, the fog gets thicker and heavier, well past as-thick-as-pea-soup status. Now, he can only see what is in front of him, this beautiful girl in his arms. He blinks back the stinging in his eyes._

_Reluctantly, Olette steps back from him, her eyes still shining. "Thanks. I needed that. I should have given you a chance earlier today. Sorry."_

"_It's no problem. Um...uh...um, you're beautiful, you know that?"_

_If this is the last chance he'll ever see her, real or fiction, he needs to tell her what he thinks of her deep down. It's nothing but good things. Never again will he look at green eyes the same way._

_At any rate, Riku is thankful that he gives her this compliment, for her entire face lights up with that perfect smile of hers._

"_You're great-looking yourself."_

_He blushes, but her responding compliment isn't all he receives. Reaching up toward his neck, Olette pulls his head down to kiss him. Chills run up his spine, spreading throughout his whole body. It would be beyond perfect if this is real. But, it's not, likely that she's gone up to heaven or some random afterlife realm. He'll meet her there someday._

_She knows how to make him happy, he thinks as she runs her fingers through his hair. "You know, I'm guessing that what I feel for you is close to love."_

"_Yeah, me too," he murmurs._

"_Goodbye, Riku." A somewhat nonchalant wave._

"_Bye." A whisper._

_Her backward glance at him before she disappears through that ridiculously thick fog. His reluctance at permanently having to let her go. And he's confused and sad and just a little angry._

He wakes up in a cold sweat, not wanting to believe cruel reality.

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><p><strong>AN: Well, somewhere along the way (don't remember which chapter), you'll find out that this sort of "crush" thing going between Riku and Olette doesn't totally spring out of nowhere. OK, so I can acknowledge this story might be a bit trippy, getting into "unrealistic territory", and for that I apologize. I guess I'm not such a big fan of totally realisitc AU. XD**


	8. Chapter 8: 2:11 PM, Thursday

**A/N: Well, here's when it gets really depressing, folks.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 8: 2:11 PM, Thursday<strong>

"So, you haven't seen Olette today?" Riku asks for clarification as he walks alongside Hayner toward his locker.

The blond guy sighs, shaking his head. "Not at all. She didn't even call any of us last night. Her parents did, though, asking if she was over at someone's house. But, no, I haven't seen her since yesterday at lunch. Why do you ask?"

He shrugs. "No reason. I was wondering about her, was all. It's just...She told me something yesterday, and she didn't give me a chance to respond. But, I was shocked, happy though. And I needed to..."

_Needed __to __what?_ Riku cynically asks in his mind. There's no point in mentioning what he'd planned to do. His dream might have revealed the answer to him. She's...It's getting more likely that she's...

But, he can hardly tell Hayner about that dream, especially since it might not be even based on a true event. Just because Olette told him in his mind that she jumped off a bridge doesn't mean that it happened for real. Right? It would be illogical.

"I hope that none of this is my fault," he finishes apologetically.

Hayner gives him a strange glance, seems to think his words over, and then smiles. "Aw, don't sweat it. I don't think you should worry about Olette breaking her heart over you. I mean, you like her too, right?"

"Yeah, but"—he stops at his locker. "I didn't get to say that to her. I've blown it."

"I wouldn't say that. You'll get to tell her."

Hmph, yeah, I already did...when she became a ghost. Riku shudders at his thought, because what if it's true? Then again, Olette could be just sick or something, even though whose parents would look for their sick kid? The sick kid would normally be at home, of course.

On to history class for last hour, relatively easy class with a fairly nice teacher. It's almost worth it to get that credit. At the same time, though, that class does bore him. He goes in and sits in his usual spot near Axel, giving him a high five.

"'Sup?"

"Ready to fall asleep again, I know that much." Axel smirks, following it up with a chuckle. Out of their group of friends, he likes school the least. No one can blame him either. The redhead has never been the school type. He's too restless.

On this day, Riku is getting restless, too. This seems like a normal day, no worries. But, it's practically too normal. The calm before the storm, like something will disturb the normalcy. One thing is going to happen...

He shouldn't think like this. The bell to start class has just rung, and the teacher gets up from her desk to start the lesson. What chapter are they on? The Civil War? Some war, he knows that much.

"I think I might sleep, too," he comments, though he'll be wide awake.

Throughout class, they copy notes to put on their notes sheet. The test will be in two weeks, Mrs. Thompson tacks on, but at least that's far off. Two weeks is forever.

Suddenly, the intercom comes on. Riku's heart stops. Maybe it's a student council rep talking about the need to fill a fan bus for the next away game. Oh, duh, it's spring. Baseball season, not football season. He feels stupid—nah, it could still be a student council rep.

Not a rep, but the principal speaks, "Good afternoon, Lakeview High School. I know it's late in the day, but I have just received some sad news."

His fingers grip his mechanical pencil a bit too tight.

Out of all dreams, why is _this _the one that comes true? That one had been sad, heartbreaking. In no way should it come to life. Now, one he had when he and Olette spent time at school, talking like they'd known each other for years—where is its reality? He'd like to know.

"One student from LHS is no longer with us," the principal formally says in a grim tone. "Olette Beaumont's body was found in Glenview Park last night at 8:52 PM in one of the lakes. She drowned and from..."

No. Just no. This is not happening right now. It's imaginary. Why is this principal revealing so many details? He's not a damn news reporter.

If he has to say it, he needs to say, "Olette Beaumont is dead." End of story!

With his mind irrevocably troubled, Riku shuts down, tuning out the principal's words. He can't stand them. Because this isn't real, since he saw her yesterday when she stopped by his locker and...and...

By the time he "tunes back in", the principal concludes, "Olette's parents wanted me to tell this to you all as a cautionary tale. She will be missed."

The intercom shuts off, and everyone in the room is dead silent. This happens to be a U.S. history class that only her fellow juniors take. They're shocked.

Most in the room did not know her, for she was quiet, a bit shy, and a phantom for the most part in the halls. But, to Riku, Olette was no phantom. And now, she's gone.

"Oh my God, Riku," Axel hisses. "Did you hear that? Olette...Olette killed herself. I'm sorry, man."

Riku says nothing, lowering his head on crossed arms. See, he'd told Hayner the truth. It _is_his fault that she's not here on this earth any more. No more will he see her smile at him in the hallway. No more will he glimpse her laughing with her friends. No more will he ever get to talk to her.

She's dead. Deceased all because of a suicide. He refuses to accept this.

Mrs. Thompson is at a loss as to what to do, considering that this is a junior student here who is no longer alive. Someone suggests they ought to talk about it. _What __a __stupid __idea,_ Riku thinks. Heck, he's surprised that he's still thinking at all. His world has momentarily stopped. This girl...this girl who told him she really liked him and probably wanted to go out with him—she can't be dead. No, not at all. Why would she be?

Mrs. Thompson decides that the horrible suggestion is a good idea, and so, history is abandoned for the day. Riku inaudibly groans, yet he continues to deny that Olette is dead.

Kids actually have memories to share about Olette. One of them mentions how they were good friends in elementary school, and they played together at the girl's house. When asked why they stopped being close, the girl mentions that she and Olette just "sort of, kind of, like, drifted apart."

Riku wants to punch her in the face for abandoning her like that. No wonder she (really?) killed herself. She had to take shit from ignorant people like that. If Olette had known what she meant to him...

Another kid says they worked with each other on a bio project.

He mentions that Olette seemed to be on the shy side, but she was a nice, gentle person. He appreciated that, but he points out that he noticed that she seemed to have a lack of self-esteem, too. So, you think that's why she...you know...? Random Kid regrets having put most of the project on Olette. Oh good God...

Axel brings up, "I would mess around in seventh grade social studies, and she'd try not to laugh. I'll always remember that."

Thanks, Axel. Thanks for not being an idiot about Olette, or he would have screamed. Nonetheless, Riku keeps not saying anything.

This isn't real. Numbness follows him the rest of the day.

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><p><strong>AN: Actually, a principal announcing a student's death is probably realistic, especially since this is supposed to be a small town. At my school, there've been a couple of kids who've died that were acknowledged before in the morning announcements. One died in an ice fishing accident and the other...well, let's just say, drug-related causes. It's pretty sad. Personally, I don't think anyone should die when they're in high school, because that seems totally unfair. Sadly, this occurs more often now than ever from what I've seen on the Internet. It's a really sad thing.**


	9. Chapter 9: 8:45 PM, Thursday

**A/N: OK, so I pretty much want to finish up this story as quickly as I can. With that said, I'm updating twice today. Just want to finish this story, so I can move on to other things.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 9: 8:45 PM, Thursday<strong>

Screw math homework. Screw English homework. Screw it all, because none of it matters any more in comparison. This would be a normal week if not for what the principal announced earlier. Six hours ago, really? It feels like forever and a day ago, to be honest. Riku admits to himself that he remains in denial about this. He is not going to believe that she's dead unless he sees the obituary. Even then, he can't be sure. He wishes that, if possible, she's still here. That suicide would be the last thing on her mind and that she would give him the chance to tell her how he feels. He'll never get to now, and that's the bitterest pill to swallow.

He remembers a simpler time in eighth grade science class, the one class they shared together all year. They were outside one day in the spring, doing this bug worksheet, and they'd been partnered up...

_Riku stares at this tree, looking at an insect and identifying it as a walking stick. Now, what order would it fall into? This worksheet is more complicated than it has to be._

_Olette, unarguably the smarter one of the two of them, walks up beside him. She looks at the ground for a second, incredibly shy._

One thing she has going for her, _Riku __thinks __as __he __idly __glances __at __her, _she's extremely cute. _Actually, __she __hasn__'__t __spoken __a __word __to __him __all __year, __and __he __kind __of __wishes __she __would. __He __sucks __at __making __the __first __move. __He __knows. __He__'__s __tried __and __failed.__This __one __girl __he __asked __out __in __the __sixth __grade __ended __up __cheating __on __him __with __some __star __athlete. __It __could __not __be __more __humiliating __than __that. __And __he __sucks __at __talking __to __girls. __What __would __he __say?_

_"Um...Hey, Riku, you found any bugs?"_

_He awkwardly points at the walking stick. "Yeah"—no thanks to sweaty fingers, he drops his pencil—"Uh, right there. What would it be under?"_

_With one glance, Olette seems to know what order it's under, tells him the name, and jots it down on her worksheet. They're to find five bugs. It would be more, but this is the front school grounds, after all. Kind of a limited area._

_"How do you spell it again?" Riku asks._

_She hands him the sheet, which he squints at since the name is loooong._

_He laughingly snorts. "I fail at science."_

_"This might sound really nerdy, but I really like science," Olette confesses with a nervous laugh, blushing furiously._

_Does she really think that he'd judge her based on her love of science? He might not be smart enough for it, but hey, she's good at it and likes it. That's awesome for her. He just admires her for that intelligence, even if other guys are like "whatever" about it._

_A half-smile is on his lips. "It may not be my thing, but it's cool that it's yours."_

_That's so corny! He cannot believe he said that. But, it's true. He's not a science guy or math guy or English guy. He's a music guy._

_"Well, um, I plan on being a psychiatrist when I'm older," she tells him, wandering off to find another bug. "My mom wants me to go to pre-med and all that. Even though she quit college herself."_

_That sounds strangely bitter coming from her, a usually bright and sunny person. Oh well, everyone has their parent issues. He won't even start on his. They're too many to count, and all involve The Bastard. Otherwise known as Dad._

_"What about you?" She's looking at him again. "What do you want to do?"_

_"Music. I play guitar," he says shyly._

_Olette's face breaks into a grin. "Awesome. I wish I could play guitar."_

_At least she's a music lover, possibly a devout music lover. They have that in common, he's sure of it. Suddenly, Riku wants to get to know her._

_"What do you do in your free time?" he asks, curious._

_She shrugs with a self-deprecating smile. "Not much. I hang out with friends every now and again, watch TV. I'm boring."_

_His eyes soften. "Really? I'm not bored yet."_

_She laughs again, still a bit nervous, but it's more genuine this time. Good. She deserves a bit of flattery, considering she might not get it every day._

_And wait, is he hitting on her?_

_Jotting down another order name (of a butterfly this time), Olette turns around, giving him a pointed stare. "Are you hitting on me?"_

_"Uh..." The blush gives him away. "Maybe."_

_That's weird. For one thing, another thing he fails at is flirting, usually. He's more likely to stutter over his words and stare at his shoes than make a line that doesn't totally go down in flames. As for his saying that he's not bored yet, well, that came naturally. Naturally...Now, that's never happened around a girl before. Riku considers this in a bright mood._

_He is positive that her pretty green eyes have done it, letting him relax around her._

_In the meantime, Olette gets rid of her fake scowl. "That's...sweet. I usually...I'm not used to this."_

_"Me neither. So, we about done yet?"_

_"Oh." She looks disappointed that they can't talk freely for too much longer, considering their assignment. "Two more bugs."_

_"What was the one you wrote in? Oh...God, I can't even pronounce that."_

_Olette giggles as though on impulse, allowing him to thoughtfully glance at her. Is it just him or does she look beautiful when she laughs?_

_However, he assumes she gets shy when she focuses on the rest of that worksheet. Too bad. He figures that she would talk more to him, since he's been warm and inviting to her enough. Oh well, she'll come around._

_It's just something new and interesting to think about as he rides his bike home. If he isn't jumping to conclusions, he could be having actual chemistry with this girl. Olette. He likes the sound of her name on his lips..._

Riku opens his eyes after recollecting the first time they'd ever talked. The sun had hit those brunette pigtails (sort of pigtails) just right, making her hair shine. He'd slowly gotten his courage up that day.

It had been a perfect day that day, which made him happy enough. Who knew he would ever be interested enough to keep looking at her like she was the most gorgeous being on Earth? Who knew she would die young? She will never experience her prom night or her first boyfriend (if she'd been honest with him in the dream) or, worst of all, graduate with him.

Goddammit...

His breathing short, Riku abruptly leaves his room to get to the nearby bathroom. His main concern is that he'll get sick.

So, once he leans over the toilet, he ends up dry retching while his stomach churns. Luckily, he doesn't vomit. Maybe it's not a literal, physical sickness, but just the thought Olette won't be walking down the hall any more or being a senior with him...It does sicken him. Because it's not fair, dammit! She...Why did she commit suicide? People did care about her, after all. How could she not realize that? She must have thought her life was screwed-up horribly. But, he cared.

More dry retching...because he pictures her drowned body. Why'd she do it? Why? That's all he'll ask her now.

Reality sinks in as a few tears manage to fall from Riku's eyes.

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><p><strong>AN: Yeah, I know, pretty depressing. But, at least that's to show they could have been more had Olette been a more open person. OK, not much to say here at this point other than review please.**


	10. Chapter 10: 12:07 PM, Friday

**A/N: More angst, more sadness. You know, the usual.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 10: 12:07 PM, Friday<strong>

TGIF, right. Friday is normally the happiest day of the week. Instead, it turns out to be the most painful for Riku. It had started out with him waking up to the alarm (that _beep, __beep, __beep _carrying on like nothing happened), and it had hit him.

She won't be there today. She won't be anywhere for forever.

It hit him even worse during his agonizingly long walk to Spanish class without her pale face in the hallway. No startling forest green eyes gazing hopefully at him, waiting for his signal that he does give a crap about her.

No smiles. Because dead people don't smile.

The whole morning has been a blur, one class falling into another in the same hum-drum fashion. And yet, he pays even less attention. He is virtually impassive when he sees that 71% on his math test paper, which fades into the background for him. It's not real. None of this is happening right now. He's trapped in some dreary existence where, funny thing is, it feels like it should be a crime to be happy. Other people aren't so lucky and so decide to jump off bridges to kill the pain. Literally. They may not have been that close, but Riku feels a part of him is missing.

So, at this moment (he can't believe he's remotely considering this as an option), he heads toward the guidance office to talk to the counselor. He has told his friends a lie by saying he'll be in the restroom. Yeah, dry retching, like he did last night. Still, he can't let them know how much this death has affected him. They'll worry too much. Maybe he'll tell Demyx the truth later. But, for now, this is deeply personal stuff that he needs to take care of.

Upon asking the secretary if Ms. Heartilly is around, he's told that she is currently finishing up with a student. Riku wonders if this student went here for the same reason. Death is a bitch to go through.

Sure enough, his assumption proves true when the door to the counselor's office opens, and a girl comes out with tears streaming down her face. It's Xion, Olette's closest friend.

"Thanks, Ms. Heartilly, I really needed this," she sniffles and gives the mid-twenty-something lady a hug. A sense of awkwardness falls over Riku as he glances away from this scene. It makes Olette's absence even more inevitable and even more poignant. He suddenly second-guesses himself about coming here. The atmosphere reminds him uncannily of a hospital. People are prone to tears there, too.

"It's no trouble, Xion," Ms. Heartilly soothes, returning the hug in a motherly way. "That's why we're here. We're a resource whenever you kids need us. This is one particular case, especially. And I'm very sorry for your loss."

"Y-Yeah." Xion wipes her nose with her hoodie sleeve, her eyes red and still tear-filled. "I better g—Riku?"

What if he gets blamed for this? In fact, yeah, he's getting ready for Xion to scream at him and tell him this is all his fault. That if he hadn't been so immobilized beyond words, Olette would still be here.

His heart nearly stops from this anxiety when this usually upbeat but now fragile sophomore girl approaches him. He sees that her face is as white as a sheet, drawn, and pained. With sadness in his heart, he speculates as to how much she has cried in the past not even twenty-four hours.

"Y—Yeah?" he mutters, unnerved at her growing nearness.

"Are you here because of...um, you know...her?" Xion asks, for the name must hurt too much to even say aloud.

Riku nods without a word.

"Did she mean a lot to you?"

A lump gets lodged in his throat as he replies in a strained voice, "More than any girl."

Murmuring a soft "aw", Xion hugs him too, and this makes him uncomfortable. He's all for this touching, but he barely knows her.

She draws back from him, mentions, "She would be really happy about that," and promptly walks out the door. Her loud sniffs accompany her. Maybe finding other people who'd seen Olette for who she really was (a great person) is Xion's way of coping, to make sense out of a senseless thing. Riku stares at the door she left through, a hollow feeling building in his chest.

Ms. Heartilly tells him, "Come in to my office, Riku," and he does. Her office gives him the sense of being on a different planet. He's never been here before.

Apprehensively, he sits on one of the chairs across from her desk, noticing the picture of her with her fiancé, Mr. Leonheart from Leon's Music, a store he actually likes visiting from time to time. It was the place where Joel had bought him his first guitar when he was twelve years old. This gift endeared him to Riku for pretty much forever. Anyway, it's a nice photo. They're out at some restaurant together, Ms. Heartilly with a beaming smile and Leonheart one that's more subtle. Why is it that counselors always have better lives than you? Riku almost resents this nice lady at the moment. She's not Janet, though, so he can relax.

Then again, Janet is probably a nice lady, too. Has he ever given her a chance? He squirms in his chair in guilt.

Meantime, Ms. Heartilly sits at her desk, hands folded in front of her. "OK, Riku, what brings you here? You're not going off campus?"

"No, I'm not...But, this has really been bugging me and I figured...I figured if I talked to somebody, I might feel better."

She smiles genuinely, not fake at all. "Well, then, you did the right thing to come here."

A silence presses over him like the invisible, hollow weight on his chest. He has a feeling that his face has gone sheet white too, and his fingers tremble the slightest bit. He starts to chicken out.

Then, much to his surprise, Riku starts to speak, "I'm here...I'm here because of Olette. She's dead."

As quickly as the words come, he stops, looks to the counselor as if for clarification.

She nods. "Yes, she is. I was shocked myself when I heard the news."

Yet, can you sound any calmer, you insensitive cow? He has this urge to scream at her, to force her to show some raw emotion. Like this emotion he's feeling, the one he's trying to get out, and it's clawing at him and clawing at him and dammit, he can't take it!

"I...I needed to talk to somebody about it." His words are even less fluid.

Closing his eyes, he struggles to breathe calmly, evenly. One way or another, these words will be spoken. He has to let them flow.

"I liked Olette. More than friends, I mean. I didn't know her, and I only talked to her twice, but she's someone you don't forget. Not to me anyway. She was so different...from all the other girls, you know? She was smart, pretty, nice, and...God, this is _my _fault."

The stinging, the horrible, cringe-worthy stinging, is back with a vengeance. His stomach churns slightly, like he'll get sick to his stomach.

At this moment, he's glad he's not a cop. If he was, he would have seen her in a way he would never want to see. Her limp body floating on the water, like she's no better than a dead fish.

Ms. Heartilly asks softly, "Why would you think it's your fault?"

"Because...Cuz the day she died, you know...Earlier that day, she told me she liked me. And I didn't say anything. She thought I didn't like her and left. I tried to get to her...I did. Now, she's gone and...and I'll never get to tell her how I feel."

His eyes get watery, so Riku does all he can to fight back these tears. He's a guy. He can't..._shouldn__'__t _cry.

He notices Ms. Heartilly scooting the Kleenex box closer to his side of the desk. Averting his eyes quickly, he tries to avoid showing the obvious hurt that's there. It's been there since last night.

"It's OK for you to cry, Riku," she points out. "This is a death. Letting your emotions out is better than holding them in. You don't have to try to be tough here."

With that, he starts crying. Silently, but the tears fall as he deals with another loss. At least his dad didn't die. Olette's gone...She's gone.

He takes two Kleenex, putting them to his eyes.

Through the Kleenex, his voice comes out muffled. "I don't get why she killed herself. I...I feel like I made her life worse or something. But...This was, like...the closest thing to love I've ever felt for somebody."

Now, that's out on the table, but it's a confession he feels needed to be said at some point. He might have loved her. If not, it was close to it. Gradually, more so than what he would like, he recovers from the tears that he shed and the sobs that nearly overtook him.

"I loved her," he repeats softly, more tenderly.

He continues to love her, and he's unsure if he could call it love, exactly. But, why else does he care so much?

Ms. Heartilly reaches out, pats his shoulder. "I understand. Or, in my definition, I suppose I've tried to understand. You can be in love at your age. It's rare, but it's easy to see you really cared about her."

"Yeah...Yeah, I did."

"And Riku? None of this was your fault. Normally, suicidal people intend to kill themselves no matter what happens in their interactions. You know, as we all do, that Olette was an honors student who had everything going for her. However, I do believe she had a deep, clinical depression."

When she gets a puzzled look from him, she continues, "I can only conclude that people in her condition premeditate suicide all along. At a certain point, there is nothing anyone can do, I'm afraid. And it usually is people like her, Riku. People who act perfectly sane and are cordial around others, trying to convince them nothing is wrong. But, don't blame yourself."

Riku releases a long, shaky sigh. "Guess I won't. I have to move on, right?"

"Right. At some point. It's OK to grieve in the meantime."

"Yeah...But, Ms. Heartilly?"

"Yes?"

He looks up at her, eyes pain-filled. "She won't be a senior with me."

That's the most devastating part in his opinion, the one thing he can't get out of his head. Will she even be remembered?

"No, she won't. It's really sad, isn't it? If you want my view, I will say that too many kids are committing suicide these days. And it isn't as though they truly had nothing. They felt trapped."

Trapped. Well, Olette spoke negatively of her mom once. Was the mom keeping too tight a leash on her? Maybe school wringed the happiness out of her. He won't end up like she did, broken from her pain. He'll stay strong.

"I think I can understand. But, it's not an easy way out. It kind of makes things worse for the loved ones."

"Exactly. Well, I'm glad you talked with me, Riku."

He smiles, just slightly. "Yeah, me too. It helped a lot."

It has, particularly with the pent-up emotions he has concealed for what has felt like forever. Forever and a day. So, though it hurts to admit it, he has come to terms with Olette's death, at least somewhat. It will take longer to be completely over her. However, turning to the guidance counselor has taken some weight off.

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><p><strong>AN: I thought it would be realistic for Riku to talk to a counselor yet keep it all secret, so that his friends didn't find out about it. I mean, guys are more hard-pressed for talking about emotions than girls are, obviously. Um, yeah, that's about it. Have a Happy Thanksgiving tomorrow, everybody.**


	11. Chapter 11: 2:13 PM, Saturday

**A/N: All right, hopefully I won't come across the "italic-words-are-squished-together" problem with the next story I do. Because this is really getting old.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 11: 2:13 PM, Saturday<strong>

Mom works from one to four o' clock in the afternoon on Saturdays, so it's just him and Joel in the meantime. He hasn't mentioned Olette's suicide to either of them yet, and he's not sure he is all that comfortable with sharing. For some reason, talking to Ms. Heartilly yesterday had been helpful, soothing even. But, that was because it had all the safety of confidentiality about it. It's part of her job not to tell anybody, not to mention she's not family or a close friend. Speaking of which, Riku told Demyx about that guidance office visit, and his best friend seemed relatively OK about that. Yeah, Dem had been great, telling him that it was the smartest thing to do.

At the moment, Riku is wary about revealing this to his stepdad, but he'll feel guilty if he doesn't tell _someone _from his family. Nonetheless, he steps into the kitchen, where Joel's getting some Oreos and a glass of milk.

"Hey, Joel."

Joel nods. "Hey, Riku. You want any?"

He gestures toward the Oreos, but Riku doubts he'll have the stomach for them so he shakes his head. Joel shrugs in an "oh well" fashion and sits down to eat his snack. Mom would flip if he ate in the living room.

Once Riku sits across from him, his stepdad surprisingly, immediately jumps into conversation. "So, I was at K-Mart the other day, picking these up, when I bumped into Mr. Thornton—Demyx's dad, you know. And he told me that someone from your grade committed suicide. That true?"

Well, he reaches the topic sooner than expected_,_ Riku thinks as he awkwardly shifts in his chair. "Um, yeah. It was Olette"—a pang at saying her name, both blessed and cursed—"Olette Beaumont. She was one of the smartest girls, top ten in the class."

"Really?" Joel's eyebrows lift.

"Definitely. And she was nice. Beautiful." A familiar tremor resonates in his voice.

A small, wry smile touches Joel's lips, for at the same time, it must be painful that someone his stepson liked should die so young. "You really liked this girl, didn't you?"

"I only talked to her once or twice but...She was so _good_. Better than me, I thought." Riku searchingly gazes out the window. "I...I think it might have been love. She felt the same way. But...I don't know. At the same time, I never really got to know her. We were both shy. And had no classes together after eighth grade, 'cept for health. That was about it."

Then, abruptly, he asks, "You ever lost someone you cared about?"

It's weird how Olette passing out of life has aged him about five years when it comes to wisdom. He can say it's taught him that he'll never see suicide as a way out, unlike Olette. Frankly, he doesn't like believing that she the honors student would end up choosing that path.

Joel mulls on this for a second before admitting, "I had a girlfriend in college. I thought she was the love of my life. But, she died in a car accident one night. Drunk driver did it. I couldn't get over it until your mom. I gotta say, Rachel is a bright spot in my life. I'm happy with her."

Riku watches as Joel takes a break from eating Oreos, as though to respect the memory of his dead first love. _So,_ he muses, _it __is __possible __to __move __on __from __something __so __traumatizing __like __a __loved __one __dying._ Time heals all wounds. Isn't that how that old saying goes?

"But, wasn't it hard? I mean, moving on from that old girlfriend?"

"Definitely," Joel replies solemnly. "Not a good way to lose someone you're going out with. That's why I believe in good ole carpe diem. Because if you don't, you'll never know what happens."

Riku glances down at the table. "Yeah."

Noticing his regret and guilt, his stepdad pats his shoulder.

And then, Riku is grateful for the people who still remain in his life, the ones who're alive. Mom, Joel, Demyx, Axel, Terra, and even Dad, Janet, Gracie, and Jeremy. He could know his stepfamily if he gives them a chance, as long as they're around.

Smiling grimly, Joel tells him, "There will be other girls. One day, you might find someone you like just as much, if not more, than Olette. I was lucky to find someone I loved even more than Valerie. In the grand scheme of things, you have to move on. If anything, you live for those who can't until you're gone. That's how I see it, Riku."

Hm, why doesn't he turn to this man for advice more often? There's a lot to be gained from listening to Joel, he realizes. Then again, maybe he'd already had some idea.

All right. He'll live for Olette. He'll live to the fullest if he has to, appreciate every breath he takes, and most of all, value the people in his life. Even the ones he's excluded in the past.

"Thanks, Joel," he says softly.

Joel waves this away. "Any time. I think we need to have more father/son bonding time."

Riku chuckles in spite of himself, but there is some truth to his stepdad's words. When was the last time they even technically hung out together? Maybe the batting cage didn't count, considering he'd taken one too many hits to the crotch. That was about five years ago. He supposes he could persuade Joel to treat him to the movies, preferably a good action flick. He'd like that. As for his emotional state, he isn't the happiest guy still, in light of the tragedy, but he's set on the road to recovery. Having these talks take a bit out of him but at the same time give a heck of a lot more back.

While he's up in his room, Riku remembers that second time of conversation.

_They__'__ve __both __shown __up __to __Namine__'__s __sixteenth __birthday __party. __There__'__s __cake, __refreshments, __and __glow __sticks __as __party __favors. __Long __story __about __them, __the __glow __sticks __especially. __Luckily __for __them, __it__'__s __a __chance __to __relax, __let __loose. __Hyped __up __on __sugar __and __music, __they__'__re __nearly, __borderline __flirting __with __each __other.__Their __fingers __are __inches __apart __from __each __other._

_"..So, then, Hayner is all like, 'Screw you!' and he gives Roxas the weirdest looking noogie I've ever seen! His arm looked bent like a chicken wing."_

_Riku __can__'__t __help __it. __He __bursts __out __laughing __at __the __funny __mental __image __in __his __head. __All __this __over __who __was __better __at _Guitar Hero? _Oh, __jeez..._

_"Your friends are extremely weird, I'll give 'em that," he responds, less shy due to the Mountain Dew (not beer, thanks), and smiles at her. Olette grins and unconsciously gets a hold of his hand._

_"That's why I love them. In fact, I'm sure you have weirder. You got to. You're a skater, so it's, like, never a dull mo—oh, sorry."_

_She realizes she's been holding his hand and retracts her hand, blushing furiously. Riku sighs, disappointed. He liked it there. So warm and soft._

_When Xion leads Olette away just then to dance to the Macarena, he murmurs, "You're beautiful."_

And she was that night. No question about it. Whenever Olette Beaumont got that glow in her cheeks, she was ten times prettier. It's too bad he lives in a world without her, and it's not just his loss either. It's the world's. She would have made a great psychiatrist. Hell, she was already a wonderful person, both inside and out. Suddenly, Riku has a pressing need to call up someone he's been treating ill for years. If there must be a world without Olette, then he does have to eventually move on. This will be the first step.

"Hello?" He gets that response from the cellphone's other end.

"Hey, Dad, it's me, Riku. I'm really sorry about what I said to you the other day..."

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><p><strong>AN: I didn't expect to put in that the stepdad had to face tragedy of his own. But, I guess that's the thing with me. In my stories, it seems that all the characters have little stories of their own, whatever's going on with them. **


	12. Epilogue: One Sunday Afternoon

**A/N: All right, I make a reference to a song off _Donnie Darko _here. I felt the particlular song was indeed fitting for the moment. I hope you guys like how I tied this up. No stupid cliffhangers or anything.**

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><p><strong>Epilogue: One Sunday Afternoon<strong>

It's not that sunny, but there's no downpour either. Only a gentle early May shower sprinkles the ground. Appropriate, considering the place where Riku is headed to on bike. Her suicide is no longer persistent on his mind, though it's back there these days, always reminding him. More than ever, as he pedals closer and closer toward his destination, he does feel sad to go there. This isn't entirely painless, after all. No, in fact, he thinks of that haunting, melancholy song "Mad World." It's summed up everything in the past month just about right. Once he spots the slightly open gates, the lyrics come to him.

"_And I find it kind of funny, find it kind of sad/the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had."_

Yes, it's a very, very mad world. Doesn't that make sense? From what he's heard, it's supposed to be about teen alienation. Riku is tempted to laugh bitterly at the irony. Poor Olette might have experienced it, but he wasn't the wiser to it. He let shyness get in the way. If he could talk to her face-to-face one more time...

But, no, he's forced to reckon with visiting her grave instead. Out of respect for her, he holds a small bouquet of flowers from his mom's garden. Some irises, tall, slender, and beautiful. He thinks she'll like them just fine.

Sad part is, he never got much "favorites" stuff out of her aside from favorite color. He smiles upon remembering she'd told him blue. His favorite color too, technically, even if it's a specific shade. These flowers are purple, but it's close enough.

He hasn't been to a cemetery in a long time, not since he was ten, when he went to Great-Uncle Willis' funeral. He never knew the man, though he hated seeing the sight of his dead body in the open casket. Despite the fact they made the old man look peaceful, the corpse eerily reminded Riku of a doll, just as inanimate and yet just as life-like. It truthfully creeped him out. When they got to that cemetery, he could recall he couldn't wait to get out of there.

This time, on the other hand, Riku feels more at peace being in this cemetery, considering no one else is around. The smell of damp earth is in the air, and the shower comes down, tranquil and lovely. No fear strikes him or threatens to tear him away from this place. So, with a heart that's nonetheless a little heavy, he walks over to the grave site where she will be. He asked Xion yesterday where he could find it, and she told him the general area where the grave was and what the tombstone looked like. He notices it's made of smooth marble with her full name imprinted on it: Olette Evelyn Beaumont.

Evelyn...Very, very rare middle name but pretty like she was.

Letting out a slightly shaky sigh, he sets the irises by her tombstone, noting that there are bouquets of daffodils and roses as well. It looks nice, pretty arrangements. There're other people out there who care about her too, obviously. So why'd she go? Time to get his closure.

"Hey, Olette," he greets, even though once upon a time, he thought it pointless to talk to the dead. "How's it going? It's me, Riku Cooper. You might not have known me real well, but we talked before. Remember?"

No, what a crap way to start. They weren't on stranger status at the time of her death.

Riku shakes his head to dismiss this unnecessary intro. "I've been wondering how you are. Are you happy now? You were suffering, apparently, so that's why I wanna know. Um...Me, I'm doing good. I actually talk to my dad now"—he chuckles—"Believe it or not. He's not this...bad guy I kept making him out to be. Guess he never was. I'm actually headed to Florida in a month and a half to meet his new family. Well, not so new but...I've been a jerk about them. Shouldn't have been, especially with Janet. She's a nice lady. I've talked to her twice now. I definitely misjudged her."

He looks away guiltily, recalling his once really harsh opinion of his stepmom.

He takes a moment to remember that very first time he ever talked to her, which was the other day. Yeah, Janet had sounded really happy to finally be acquainted with him. And since she was a yoga instructor, there was this free-spirited vibe about her. Cool with him. He knows now that Gracie and Jeremy will be the two cutest kids he has ever met. On top of his intimate conversation with Joel last month, Riku feels that he's getting all his priorities in order. It's been a long time coming.

With a look of sad longing in his eyes, he rests his hand on top of the tombstone. He hopes she can hear him from beyond the grave.

"So, I need to tell you something," he tells the grave (though, he's technically speaking to her, in his way), his voice barely above a whisper. "You probably remember the day you killed yourself more than anybody. You told me you liked me, and I was too damn stupid to say anything. But, you left the school before I could say anything. I know you probably had your doubts. The truth is, Olette, I really liked you. More than some random person, more than a friend—more than _anybody_. And it killed me when I found out you died. I didn't want you to go that early. I wanted to tell you this when you were alive."

An inadvertent shudder passes through him, so he temporarily lets go of the tombstone. That miserable feeling hasn't entirely left him yet. It will after a while, once he feels like his life is back to some kind of normal. However, he knows for sure he won't date another girl for the rest of his high school life. Out of respect for her but also out of the deep caring he ended up having for her.

Riku runs his fingers through his hair to calm himself down. All right, he can breathe evenly again.

"I liked you," he repeats in a gentle murmur. "Still do, but I have to move on sooner or later. For now, though, there's not gonna be anyone for a while."

A while. That's all he can phrase it as, because in a funny sort of way, it sounds optimistic. It rolls off the tongue better than "forever", that's for sure. He then resolves to tell her (the grave, whatever, it stops mattering at this point) why he held affection for her.

"You were a good person, you know?" He smiles hesitantly. "Smart. Funny. Beautiful. Anyone would have been lucky to know you. Even just being around you was incredible. Speaking from experience here, you were amazing. So, I don't think I'll ever really understand why you killed yourself. You must have been going through hell no one else knew about.

"I couldn't believe, though, how many kids just saw you as the smart girl. The one they could mooch answers off of. Well, you were never that to me. Never. I saw you for the real you, even if, like, five other people did, too. I cared about you, Olette. A lot."

That's it. He finishes up what he feels needed to be said. Thank God for that, too. His fingers start trembling a little, but he ignores this to reassuringly pat the stone. Everything will be OK...someday.

Wait, one more thing.

"It might have been love, too. If you hear me, give me a sign, OK?"

So stupid, speaking with the dead like they're still up and around and can talk back. Riku will give it a shot anyway, to find out if there might be a sign.

Just when he doubts it, the stray clouds part to reveal a sliver of sunshine. It's not much, but it's something. A breeze goes along with it too, rustling through his hair. Riku smiles.

He gets up from his sitting position. "Bye, Olette. It's been great knowing you."

And you know what? It has, it really has. Like he swore to himself, he'll live for her from now on. For, even in death, she still inspires him.

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><p><strong>AN: I suppose it was kind of cheesy here at the end, but I believe if you're gonna put a lot of angst into a story, there's gotta be hope too, even if it's just a tiny sliver. So, I'm glad I wrapped this up. And I won't make any other story within a story deal from ADoIR, no Demyx's point of view or anything. XD Glad if you guys read it, you took the time to read it. Thanks.**


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